Scott Pilgrim vs. the Review (very minor spoilers)

[Bartlebycs]

*I decided to put up the review I wrote for my FB account since it was much better and got across more of what I was trying to say.* 


So I went out and saw Scott Pilgrim at Seven Bridges yesterday, and I took my mom with me since we usually enjoy the same kind of movies. I can honestly say that you NEVER want to show this movie to a person who hasn't played a video-game since the Tetris era. It really requires it's audience to have an inner geek. I can't stress this enough, you NEED to love video-games to love this movie.

... Are you prepared to suspend your disbelief? Then let us begin.

STORY
Scott Pilgrim immediately shows us it's geek right as soon as the logo for Universal Pictures pops up in it's 16-bit glory, with it's theme remixed via synthesizer, becoming something you'd hear on the Super NES. I looked over to my mom, who already seemed confused. Oh dear.

We then shift to a scene of Scott (our hero, well yours maybe, not mine) Pilgrim, played coherently by Hollywood's gofer-boy, Michael Cera. Because every other twenty-something actor in the world was busy. So Scott's in a band called Sex Bob-Omb (which is the best band name EVER) with his two friends Stephen Stills and Kim Pine who I will talk more about later.

Scott's at a time in his life right now where he's kinda feeling like a loser at everything, though he doesn't admit it. That's Kim's job apparently. And she reminds him of it alot. I really like Kim. But again, more on that later...

Anyway, Scott's currently dating a chinese girl named Knives Chau to help him get over a recent break-up that happened a couple months ago. Yea, Scott's a slow healer. Knives is Sex Bob-Ombs biggest fan, which is easy when she's their only fan. And let me tell ya, the girl is definitley hyper with a case of ADD. She's everything Scott thinks he needs right now, because he doesn't drink beer or get high. Why would he need to when Knives is there to scream out how much YOU GUYS ROCK!!!! They kinda don't, but a 17 year old girl wouldn't know that. Oh, did I mention Knives is 17? And Scott's 22? I did? Okay just checking, cause that's kinda important. Okay, so Knives is a 17-year-old asian catholic school girl complete with uniform, and Scott is too shy to do anything but hold her hand, much to her disappointment and his friends relief.

Now, Scott lives in a one-room apartment with his gay roomate Wallace. One room means they have to share a futon. Which isn't as crazy as it sounds. I like that they don't really treat the sharing a bed thing as a joke. Not when there's so much else about this guy to joke about. First though, big major props to Kieran Culkin, whom you know as Macauley Culkin's kid brother. Not only is he absolutely hysterical as Wallace, but he actually steals every single scene he appears in from then on. Wallace is a guy who knows his place in life and speaks as a voice of semi-reason in Scott's life. Yes he shouldn't have stolen Scott's sister's boyfriend, yes he probably shouldn't hit on so many guys, and yes, he might be a little inconsiderate when he has an orgy with them in the futon while Scott is sleeping on the other side of him. But he does these things anyway because Wallace does not fear consequence. He readily accepts that he is a slut, and moreso that it's not such a horrible lifestyle. Shouldn't we all feel this way?

One night Scott has a dream that he's in a vast desert, and he begins yelling that he's lost and alone, when a girl on rollerblades passes by telling him he's not alone, he's just dreaming. True. But waitaminute, what the hell was that??

So as the next day goes by, Scott suddenly discovers that the girl he dreamed about was real, named Ramona Flowers, and that she worked as a delivery girl for Amazon.ca (Canada's Amazon.com, for you out-of-towners) So he orders a package from the site and waited all afternoon. After Wallace points out that it probably won't come on the same day he ordered it, Scott decides that his roomate is depressing and wrong. And when the doorbell rings, Scott is all too quick to answer it. Who was on the other side? Could it have been Ramona? Scott's dream girl?

"Attack-Hug!!!!!" and it comes attached with a free Knives Chau! Well great!  Following, came a really awkward "date" since you can totally tell that Scott's heart wasn't in it.  Knives doesn't really notice, of course, cause of her ADD.

But yes, days later Ramona does indeed come to his door. And he has to sign for the package. Scott professes his undying love for her. And he has to sign for the package. He tells her all about the dreams he had and she tells him it's cause she likes taking the convenient subspace highway that happens to go right through his head, 3 seconds for an otherwise 15 minute trip. Also that he still has to sign for the package. Scott asks if she'd like to "hang out" with him sometime. If she agrees, will he sign for the package? He does! Success! We never really learn what was in the package, but I don't think Scott really knew either, so it's all good!

Ramona soon becomes the love of Scott's life, the missing piece to his puzzle, the--oh crap, he really should break up with Knives...

 ...Of course there's a small catch to dating Ramona Flowers.  A tiny detail, really.  There's this league that consists of her seven evil exes, and they kinda all want to kill Scott.  See?  No biggie.

We learn that Ramona met some really bizarre characters back in the states.  Really bizarre.

The other reviews I've read all say that the fights were very repetitive, but I didn't find it so.  Most were pretty damn enjoyable and funny.  Wallace yelling out tips (Fight, Scott, Fight), and the cartoony sound effect text that was upgraded from the old Batman show (surely you remember Smack, Pow, and Bam?) and lots of cool visual effects that excited my young mind and further exhausted my poor mother.

In between battles, we get a romantic comedy with Scott trying harder than he ever did to keep Ramona's interest (Another change from the book.  I'll explain later).  As Kim says, she's far too good for him.  I really like Kim.  More later.
8.0 out of 10

PLAYERS (I won't be including everyone, just the people of note)

Scott Pilgrim:  I really think Michael Cera was wrong for this role.  He didn't even bother to straighten out his curly hair.  And honestly, he kinda bored me throughout.
4.2 out of 10

Knives Chau:  She starts out slow, but Knives really grabs you with her with screams and hyperness, not too mention homicidal tendencies when Scott starts dating Ramona.  I wish she got more screentime though.  Ellen Wong has star potential and hopefully we'll see more of her soon.  Fun fact:  Knives may only be 17, but Ellen's 25, making her actually OLDER than Cera.
8.5 out of 10

Wallace Wells:  Can we please find Kieran Culkin more work?  We need more laughter in our life.  Wallace Wells reminded me of David Spade back in his SNL years.  Snarky, Sarcastic, Rude, and the only really sensible one in the movie.  He made Scott break it off with Knives before he went any further with Ramona.  Has Scott's sister, Stacey, on speed dial and is able to inform her of her brothers dirty dealings even when he is passed out drunk.  It's a skill.  Also Wallace proudly gets an entire song dedicated to him when he heckles the rival band. (I Hate You, Please Die - Crash and the Boys.  Now on iTunes!)
12 out of 10

Stacey Pilgrim: Scott's younger sister who doesn't really do much other than chastise Scott and exist.  Meh.
2.0 out of 10

Ramona Flowers:  I really have a problem with movie Ramona.  Okay, see, in the book the relationship is mutual and you can see that she cares for Scott deeply.  Movie Ramona is more or less along for the ride, and Scott seems to be doing most of the pining in the relationship.  Most of the time it's like she could care less and it really turned me off.  I'm in love with book Ramona.  Movie Ramona can kiss my ass.

Also, I could totally tell that was a wig.  Mary Elizabeth Winstead isn't fooling anyone.
1.0 out of 10

Kim Pine:  This is the girl Scott should have ended up with.  Not Ramona, not Knives, but Kim Pine.  Sex Bob-ombs drummer and lead counter; "WE ARE SEX BOB-OMB!!  ONE TWO THREE FOUR".  She and Scott have a history that is only mentioned in passing in the movie.  Adult Swim released an animated short about their past which I suggest you check out on Youtube.  It's voiced by the actors (Michael Cera and Alison Pill, respectively).  Scott believes he and Kim "worked things out" and are now good friends, as he is always too self-centered to realize that her dark mood and sarcastic comments towards him are really cries of pain and anguish over what he did to her years ago.  My absolute favorite moment in the movie is when Scott finally mans up and apologizes to her for just about everything, and we see a smile form on the cold-hearted Kim's face.  It was just a touching scene.  Sure they're gonna have a lot more rocks to walk over, but you knew then that at least Scott would start making more of an effort to heal their friendship.
10 out of 10

BATTLE STRATEGY GUIDE
Matthew Patel:  Who actually went through the trouble of sending Scott an e-mail days ago explaining the league and how he will be fighting him soon.  Scott "skimmed it" until it bored him, and he promptly deleted it.  Matt expressed his anger through song.
7.0 out of 10

Lucas Lee: Former pro skater turned actor, and current stalking victim of Wallace Wells.  Lucas was where the movie kinda went in it's own direction.  He was much more of a sell-out in the book, willing to let Scott beat him for a couple bucks.  Not saying Movie Lucas wasn't fun to watch.
6.5 out of 10

Todd Ingram:  Played by Brandon "Superman" Routh.  Rock star and powerful Vegan.  For you see, in the Scott Pilgrim-verse a vegan uses more than just 10% of their brain power, allowing them to obtain the power of telekinesis.  This fight would have easily been my favorite had it not been for the cheap ending.  Some of you already know what I'm talking about, but the arrival of the "Vegan Police" really pulled me out of the story for a minute.  Bit too unbelievable in an already unreal world.
8.0 out of 10

Roxy Richter:  Yea, Ramona was going through a bi-curious phase.  My personal favorite simply because of the way they fought.  I'll save it for a surprise.  But expect Ramona to get in on this one.
10 out of 10

The Katayanagi Twins:  Yup, she dated twins.  Kinky.  Do you like Guitar Hero?  I sure do.  This battle was epic, and all of Sex Bob-omb got involved!
7.0 out of 10

Gideon: The final boss, Scott'll need more than just his fighting prowess to beat this one.  And he stole Ramona away!  What an ass!
5.0 out of 10

??????:  Who is this mysterious being that Scott must face alone?  I'll never tell!
?? out of 10

OVERALL GAMEPLAY
Scott Pilgrim vs. the World isn't a masterpiece in cinema by any means.  It won't change how you see movies, and it probably won't change your life, but it carries a charm that you can relate to.  It's a story about becoming a man, about gaining self-respect, about love and consequence, and about how you should always listen to the gay guy.  It may indeed be the first successful video-game movie.  Too bad it wasn't adapted from an actual video-game (the PS3 game doesn't count).  It would definitley alienate any non-geek, as my mom is sure evidence of.  But if your into that kinda thing, then I truly recomend it.
8.5 out of 10